Step 1: Separate Your Emotions From the Object
While trying to purge an item remember how it made us feel when we first bought it and used it. It wraps itsself around our hearts and refuses to let go. Separate your feelings. If it's not art you've hung/displayed or heirlooms, purge!
Example: I had a bikini top I couldn't bring myself to donate. I'd lost the bottom and outgrown it, but it recalled carefree early college times with friends. In the end, it's just a stupid piece of cloth! Out it went!
Step 2: Realize We Use STUFF as an Impermanent Solution for A Primal Physical Need
"Advertising is based on one thing, happiness. And you know what happiness is? Happiness is the smell of a new car. It's freedom from fear. It's a billboard on the side of the road that screams reassurance that whatever you are doing is okay. You are okay." - Donald Draper, Mad Men
Remembering I don't want the item, but what it PROMISES keeps me from buying Stuff I don't need.
Example: I'm not letting myself buy new clothes until I've hit my weight loss goal. I realize it's not the clothes I want, but the healthier, toned body I feel the clothing will project. I'd rather invest in healthy food than buy a new dress as a temporary fix. Same with organizing supplies: it's not the supplies I want, it's an organized life! I'd rather purge items so I don't need additional organizers to hold them than buy the false solution.
Step 3: Keep Only the Best and NONE of the Rest
Same bookshelf above AFTER! I downsized my books to one shelf, now I have "white space"!
Now that you understand your psychological dependence on Stuff, detach! Do this slowly, I stress this because I often try to do it all at once and end up with a big house-mess for a week. Don't keep a static item because you'll "use it later" when you haven't touched it in a year or longer. Kill that clutter!
Step 4: Make New Rules and Priorities, Don't Budge on Them
My new priority is buying ONLY high quality merchandise/supplies as needed for reselling and blogging and healthy, delicious fruits, veggies, nuts, and supplements. Rules to keep my house clutter free include listing new merchandise IMMEDIATELY after it comes in and making my purging cycle routine.
I feel amazing in this dress, but I shouldn't need a dress to feel amazing. Don't let Stuff fill emotional voids!
Step 5: Continue The Cycle, and Enjoy Your New Clutter-Free Life
It's heaven to reach into a drawer and pull out exactly what you need without searching! Live with only what you use and love and you won't look back! Continue the cycle by evaluating what's around that you're not using as you go about your day and purging the unnecessary bits. Move things out when you move new things in.
Kill The Lust: When my Stuff Lust demands sweaty satisfaction I remember the steps in this post to keep my life sane! I'd love to read your thoughts....
How do you keep Stuff from taking over? What steps to do you take to purge or declutter?
Great advice! I usually have a massive purge every year but this year's was probably the biggest yet. I told myself that if I don't LOVE it, it can't stay. A strong "like" is not good enough - even if someone has given it to me and I feel like I should keep it. Only the "love" items get to stay. I've found that I can get rid of pretty much anything without guilt - unless it has a face! Knick-knack....stuffed animal....greeting card....anything that has some kind of crazy animal looking back at me? I somehow feel like I'm mistreating them by putting them in the box. I know, it's completely crazy. Even those guys got let go though.
ReplyDeleteCongrats on your purge, from what I've seen of your amazing home you've done an excellent job! I do feel guilty purging gifts from friends and VHS tapes I loved watching as a kid...but they gotta go!
DeleteThank you for the sound advice, I needed the reminder. Btw, I like your idea of listing immediately. No mercy! :)
ReplyDeleteIndeed! The not-too-distant memory of my house full of boxes of stuff to list keeps me going. Hell, still have boxes of stuff to list, it's just in storage at my boyfriend's now.
DeleteThis is awesome advice! I really need to purge a ton of items. I just went through my closet recently and it felt great! When we moved to Australia we got rid of practically everything we owned. We kept a few choice furniture items, my husband's giant comic book collection, etc. We put what was left in storage for the day when we would have it shipped over. We went to Australia with 4 suitcases and 2 bags full of stuff. It was the most amazing feeling being disconnected from our possessions like that. Very zen. We ended up moving back after 6 months though because it was going to be hell to get my husband's visa. (I'm a dual citizen.) But I remember that carefree life of little possessions that we lived for 6 months while traveling around Australia! sigh...
ReplyDeleteI did the same for my closet and love it, it's nice to know you I'll love whatever outfit I pull out of there because the duds are diminished. I always pack with one carry-on when I travel and it's INCREDIBLY liberating and like you said, Zen. It certainly encourages me to live a life with less! We think we need all our junk but humans are incredibly adaptable. Once it's all gone, we don't miss it at all.
DeleteSo true Van! Yeah I should have clarified, we dropped off our suitcases and bags at my dad's and only traveled with one bag each when we were on the road. The reason we went there with so much is because at that point we were moving there indefinitely and we had clothes, shoes, coats, computers, paperwork we would need, etc. :)
DeleteI'd say that's admirably little to move over there with considering you'd be there to stay. I love that fresh feeling of having a new place, before we start buying and filling it to the brim with Stuff again! Ha!
DeleteAn excellent topic for resellers and those of us with a 'collectors tendency', which is what I have ( as you know ). I have a one in one out rule. New things I love *must* replace 'meh' items, in a one for one swap. It's hard sometimes, but like you said, be ruthless. You will only enjoy your stuff if its got a proper place in your home. I tend to obsess over items for a looooooong time too, and let myself do that before I buy. Not always possible in a thrifting/flea market setting, but it gives me ample time to know what I really want, and what is just a passing whim.
ReplyDeleteI do that too, I'll keep a wish list for ages before I buy. Over time it thins out significantly as you realize it's something you just wanted impulsively. This has come back to bite me in the ass when it comes to unique items like vintage or art from a shop that got snapped up because I was waiting it out, but over time I forget about the item completely. Guess it wasn't so important after all ;)
DeleteI don't have a stepped process to purging like you've outlined but I do, do it and regularly throughout the year. That includes editing out stock, personal items, household goods etc. Being thrifty there are always things coming into the home and we often find family and trends passing things onto us all year round. So the purging is always happening on some level. If I'm considering for example editing something out of my stock I'll often consider an upcycle or revamp first, sometimes gifting otherwise it will go to a carboot sale or garage sale we organise and then donated if not sold.
ReplyDeleteOh and you do look amazing in that dress by the way Van. X
DeleteSame here, I make a habit of it so it keeps happening organically. I've purged more than ever this year and love the results! And thanks for the kind words!
DeleteGreat advice-- it's easy to bogged down by "things." I'm wondering about your relisting thoughts on Etsy. If an item does not sell, do you relist or just get rid of it? I suppose it depends on the item. A few things I can't decide on. Any thoughts anyone?
ReplyDeleteMy first round of listing is upcoming. My game plan is to relist some items, adding better keywords and descriptions since my first batch was done in a rush. The items I don't relist will be grouped into "gift sets" by theme and type. I'm going to host a big "super sale" on the blog, probably next week to sell off lots of other stuff for cheap that just needs to go. Some will be donated, but most won't.
DeleteIn the past I have gone through big purges where I donated merchandise/potential merchandise.
Great ideas-- I had thought about grouping items too. Might try that on down the road.
DeleteGood luck! I've sold a few of my groups, it's a great way to offer value to to buyer while moving merch that wouldn't move on their own.
DeleteI run an op Shop so it is too easy for me to acquire "stuff". Because i dont have time or energy to do big clean outs i do it as I go. i keep a bag hanging off a door and as I find something i dont use, wear or fit i put it in the bag to donate. when the shopping sized bag is full i donste it and replace the bag on my door to keep going
ReplyDeleteI love the bag idea! I do the same, I add things to a box to donate or move out of my apartment and into the merchandise storage room at my boyfriend's house day-to-day. I do this as I realize I have duplicates of something, don't use something, or am tired of looking at something. Fun thing about thrifting, you can switch things up on a dime.
DeleteI regularly purge. This post is a great reminder to keep at it. My main problem is my husband not wanting to clean out his areas. He doesn't go into the drawer for years, but will not clean it out. I keep at him and little by little he ends up agreeing that less is better. Plus sometimes my purging rubs off on him.
ReplyDeleteMy mom has the same exact problem with my dad. We're going to schedule purging days at their house once a week.
DeleteYou don't need that dress to feel amazing, but you sure look amazing in it! Cuteee! I am constantly battling the chaos of my house! Purge! List immediately! Sort! Aghhhh! I hope to one day be there. It can seem overwhelming.
ReplyDeleteBecky :)
Aww..thank you, Becky. I NEVER ends for me, either. Never! But it's gotten a lot better with persistence. Maybe one day we'll "get there"!
DeleteI purge regularly to keep myself from being an old lady buried under old bills. But I'm not good at cleaning, so even though I purge, I don't always feel good. So last weekend, I decided to take an extra hour to vacuum all the accumulated dust behind furniture and clean all my linens. Then I felt like everything was fresh and it made my mind feel fresh.
ReplyDeleteAlso, I have a basket by the front door with stuff to donate and return to people from whom I've borrowed. It helps me remember to get rid of it ASAP.
Last thing: I don't own the place I live in, and that makes me feel disempowered to solve problems, like if something needs to be done, cleaned, fixed, etc. I've been realizing that I don't have to be beholden to other people's capacity to do things. That's pretty abstract, but it made me feel less like a victim, and it helped me feel like I had control over my own environment. I just had to own it.
I love your last point. I've been on my own for 7 years, with a roommate the last year. I could move into my BF's house and have my own office and ample storage space but there's something to being independent and creating something that's entirely your own. Though right now all I'm creating is messes. Time to clean!
DeleteWe are renovating the basement and it's forcing me to organize all of my vintage inventory. I had a room full of shipping boxes. Just separating all the bubble wrap, peanuts and recycling the old boxes has made a huge difference. I took one storage room and removed anything that wasn't inventory or packing supplies for my shop. I'm on day two of my purge with a Jeep full of items to donate. Somethings just aren't worth listing online or taking up room in my booth. It's better to let that stuff go and forget about. I feel so much better now with way less stress and stuff in my life!
ReplyDeleteI've done that before. You're right, you just can't list it all sometimes. It feels good to get it out of your life and focus on your best. I'm about to do the same, though I want to have a big sale on the site to offer most of what I want to donate to readers for a low price before it gets donated.
DeleteHey! I just saw the Etsy blog! Congrats on your melmac cups being featured! :)
ReplyDeleteWhaaaat!? Just took a look to see it, that's awesome. Funny that they had to cover the toy, gotta keep that in mind for future photos.
DeleteThanks for letting me know, I'd have had no idea otherwise. Need to read their blog more.
DeleteAll great points, Van. My motto is: Out with the old...in with the old. I'm a good thrifter, because I'm a good donor to the thrift. If I lose weight, my ill-fitting wardrobe is going to the thrift. When I'm done reading books that I don't resell, off to the thrift they go. And if, like a recent post, I score a BUNCH of stuff. Then a BUNCH of stuff in the same vein has to go out. I came across a stockpile of mint records...but don't want to be a music hoarded. So after ripping some of my less-favorite albums to mp3...off to the thrift they go. I'll still have a digital (and clutter-free) version of it, so there's no remorse.
ReplyDeleteI'm careful to avoid clutter...because I want the space to use what I enjoy having!
<3 Jackie @ Let's Go Thrifting!
Yuuup, it's a good rule to follow. Just like you said, can't enjoy the new when you have all this clutter blocking your access to it!
DeleteThis is such an awesome list, and I think step #2 is especially excellent (and sometimes a little difficult, at least for me) to remember.
ReplyDelete#2 is my favorite to explore, too. This was almost entirely a post on human's psychological addiction to stuff, it's fascinating!
DeleteGreat tips to stay uncluttered. When it comes to buying for myself, I'm always trying to save money, so before I buy anything, thrifted or not, I really give it a lot of thought before plunking down my money. I was brought up to be frugal, and that has never left me. Another thing I like to do is to remind myself if I had to move, would I want to pack it up and take it with me? That also serves as a deterrent to keep me on the straight and narrow.
ReplyDeleteI now think of the "would I want to pack it up and take it with me" rule all the time, too, and it's a BIG help for keeping minimal!
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